My life has been pretty wild lately! In the past week I have seen 800 apartments and called about at least 20, 000. I happened upon a poetry salon, or it happened upon me, and I was invited to a beauty event for bloggers.
Shopping for an apartment is stressful, and I know renewing my visa will be too, but its not impossible. I just wish I could find a permanent place ASAP so I can focus on other projects. I naively thought it would take me a week max, but my generous host family from my JYF year has been letting me stay with them for the time being.
Not to be overly emphatic, but I love Paris and I am soooo happy here. I think if other people could be as happy as I am here, then there would be no problems in the world. I mean just sitting in a stupid bus passing the Invalide just makes me smile. I love it here, and I am glad I came back to see if this could really work.
I did TAPIF for two years because at first it was exciting to be back in France with a “job.” I only did it my second year as I enjoyed the freedom it offered me even if I was not in Paris. Now that I am finally here almost four years later, it just seems a bit surreal. I am finally doing what I have wanted to do all along- living in Paris as an adult.
People ask me all the time, “Why Paris?” The truth is I cannot explain it any more than someone can explain why they love their significant other. I just knew instantly I wanted to be here no matter how hard it would be or how long it would take. I loved it from the moment I saw it and all of its glitter. If a city can understand a person, then all I can say is that it does just that.
Whenever I think of my love for Paris, I cannot help but think of it like a relationship. I am obsessed by this city, and I adore it soooo much. Of course, I can get tired of its incessant gray skies and surly population. However, I will always come back to it no matter how often or how long I cheat on it by visiting other places. We may break up in the future or we could stay together for ever. I do not know the future of my relationship with this city just as nobody else does with theirs. I hope it lasts forever, but I have to be realistic too.
People tend to think I am crazy for either two reasons:
A)OMG I CANT BELIEVE YOU LIVE THERE THATS SO COOL, but I could never do it.
B) YOU LIVE THERE? THAT’S NUTS, DUDE. Aren’t the French rude and do they even have grocery stores? America is so much better and less stinkier.
I get this all the time, and by now I know to just nod and smile. They may not understand, but I do not need anyone too. I think as long as I am happy here then I will remain where I am. Sure, I might miss out on a lot of things by not living in America that I do feel wistful about at times. But, I have always chosen Paris for better or for worse. And, I will be the first to admit that it t has not been the easiest path to take – that is for sure. But, sometimes relationships require sacrifice, and if you are not willing to put in the effort, then why bother? I think you really have to want something if it is going to work.
After all of that is said and done, I have only really come across a few people who seem to get it. It being the need to be a foreigner in a place that is not familiar. All of them have this desire to live abroad and experience new things. Not to sound pretentious, but the only people have understood are other wanderers and travelers who overly romanticize everything like I do.
I love the quote that I use under my title, and I even based my blog name on it:
Not All Who Wonder Are Lost.
I knew Tolkien said it, but I just now realized its from a poem. I just think that this line really summarizes my thoughts on the world. I may wander about endlessly, but I do have a destination in mind. I am just waiting for the right path to take me there.